Angry at real life/university again

[Sanna]

I really need to scream. I really need to hit something. I really need to beat something up and then cry and scream and wail reeeeaally bad.

I hates them all, nasty little adminses. They took it from us, from ME, my precious...

For three years I have looked at this one dorm... and dreamt. And waited. And hoped, and waited, and crossed my fingers, and held my tounge, and waited. Because at the end of the line, my senior year in college, I was going to get out of the cinder block coffin-cells they try to call "dorms" and live... in Gregson. Two more feet on both dimensions (12x14 instead of 10x12 or 9x10), carpet in the rooms, in the hallways, real doors on the closets, nicer showers and bathrooms, it's a quieter dorm, smaller population, better climate control.... I was going to go there. And live. My senior year.

For this next part, forgive me if I start repeating nouns and adjectives; my list of EQTC-board-acceptable ones is very small.

Do you know what they did? Do you know what they did??? Can you think of the worst, most denigrating possible decision they could possibly impliment, to really screw me over and piss me off?


They made Gregson, my shining jewel among dorms... a freshman only dorm.

The nasty little {goons} are going to get their grubby little germs all over my beautiful dorm. The creepy, innocent, spoiled, naive, "drop after first year" freshman are going to be living in MY DORM! MINE! That I WAITED FOR! PATIENTLY! For three god **** years!! Without even complaining that much!! "Freshman experience" my **** ass.

Do you know what MY 'freshman experience' was? I lived in the dorm that was a fifteen minute walk to the edge of campus, then a further ten to the building with all my classes. The cafeteria was that far away too. I walked in the heat, in the cold, in the rain, in the cold rain, in the snow, in the ice, in the sleet, and once in mild hail. I DEALT with wet feet in wet socks in wet boots for 3 hours in class, then the 20 minute walk BACK to the dorm where I lost feeling in my toes. I got sick, and walked. I lived in a 9x10 cinderblock room with my keyboard on my lap because the shelves were too low for computer monitors to fit under, and the desk was too small to fit everything on. I dealt with the wrist pain. I dealt with the showers and the sinks. I dealt with the girls that liked to keep their boyfriends overnight. That was MY god**** 'freshman experience'.

And now they want to give... MY ROOM... to my indescribable little brother. MY BROTHER. Is coming here in the fall. And HE can live in Gregson.

But I cannot.

I will be told: "There are other dorms. The cinder block you've lived in for two years already for example, or the brand new 'Northwest Quad' that is once again a ten minute walk to campus and then another eight to classes. It's new! You get your own nine by eight room with a window smaller than the width of a twin bed, all to yourself (and the three other people (and their significant others) in your suite)."

I am so unbelievably livid. I am crying. The {people of illegitimate birth}, the unbelievable ... AAA! I hate them all! Do I not pay them enough fing money?? Do they really have their heads so far up their asses that they can't figure out why it's so dark??


Do you see why I hate reality?? {DARN} MORONS! All of them! You get in an administrative position with power over people's lives and your IQ decreases by half every year! There must be some Secret Student Screwing Committee that meets in dark rooms and tries to make me cry. Why the **** hell do I think that life is going to get any BETTER when I get out! What is the point of trying to fight all these dense idiots with their titles and their salaries (which /we/ pay, tyvmkthxdie) only to get beat with a Rusty Two Handed Axe no matter which way I turn? Why would I want to continue walking this path if it will never get any better? What's the point?? WHY BOTHER?

I hate them all. Liars, thieves, cheats, lie again to try to cover it up. Pay the football coach a million a year, the english department is low on staples, and I can't live in Gregson.

-- Sanna
/crying
waiting for the day when I just don't wake up again.
I hate, hate, hate, hate them all....


{edit: *blink* While I can clearly see that you made an heroic effort to keep it clean, I’ve made a few substitutions, as you were upset and missed some. *HUGS* and feel better soon, ~Maeve}

[Nhin Impious]

Have you looked into off-campus housing?

Nhinx Aphsion
who got a 3 bedroom with 2 roommates for the price of a dorm room, with a big window and a yard and a big kitchen and own bathroom (course I had to clean the bathroom, which is part of Real Life that sucks)

[kiztent]

You'll appreciate your shiny new house with the piano in the library all the more now Sanna.

(that's the best I could do for positive, that really sucks :/ )

[Xefin]

I think it's worth noting I lived off-campus, by myself, close to all the relevant buildings of my college career, for about 2/3 of what it would have cost me to live on campus. And that's counting money spent on food, parking, etc.

I think the amount dorms charge you for what they offer is pretty awful. The only reason I lived in a dorm for much of my college life is because it was smack in the center of campus. If the school can't even offer you a prime location, don't live there.

[Krazick]

Hmmm... I seem to recall my long ago college days. When I was living on campus...

Freshman year:
Dorm Room - 10 x 10 Cinderblock walled, small window, no carpets that I shared with another fellow I never had met before. Communal showers/bathrooms...

No TVs in room, no microwave... no Computers (much less Internet Connection)

Sophmore year:
Same type of dorm room, (different dorm) But with a fellow I selected.

Junior year 1st quarter again, same type of room... with a better friend to share with. After that I got off-campus with a much better friend.

That was 23-25 years ago.

Policy changes do really bite at times. And the best suggestion is of course to check out off-campus options. And remember that in 5-10-20 years from now you will be laughing at it all.

You will have a wonderful home of your own, that will be YOURS to do with as you please. It might seem like a long long time to wait. But make the most of each day... and relax.

[Phabos]

Okay, my turn. (Yes, I'm still on the boards, lurking about)


First of all, I sympathize. University life isn't easy.

Now, from the perspective of someone who has seen both sides of this issue...


By way of background, for three years I was a member of Residence Hall Government at my undergraduate college, one as a member, one an executive officer, and one as President. The Department of Residence Life would come to us with their plans for the future, explain the reasoning for their decisions, solicit input, and then develop policy. And yes, they listened.

My second year there, the department banned all smoking in the halls. At the time, there were a few floors in one or two buildings that allowed smoking. For health, safety, and general well-being of the student population, the department, with student input, made those floors smoke free. Smokers were, to say the least, unhappy. There was a conscious policy decision, after examining what new and current students wanted, to choose the desires of the many over the desires of the few. It was not designed to "screw" smokers over or piss smokers off. No one was out to get them.

So, smoking is terrible and should be banned for the health of all and it's just generally nasty and that doesn't count? Read on...

During that same time frame, the university experienced record enrollments. New freshmen, who the state has promised available housing to, (yes, even if it includes not renewing existing student contracts), were about to flood the campus the upcoming year. There was a hall with coed floors, two and four person suites, carpet, bathrooms in each suite, new appliances, etc. That hall had been reserved for sophomores and higher. The university was forced to open that hall up to freshmen. That irritated many. Residents who lived there and were returning were upset. Some moved as a result. Residents that had intended on transferring to that hall were upset. Again, some moved off campus. The Resident Advisors (RAs) who had worked and lived there were mad. Many of them quit in protest.

So what happened? Yep, the hall was still opened to freshmen. The main thing, however, is why.

The enrollments that were ever increasing demanded it. Did the Department of Residence Life and Services administration sit in a meeting and ask, "How can we irritate a large portion of the on-campus population?" Or, "How can we "screw" person XYZ?" Of course not.

The university had a need it had to fill in some way. It surveyed its options, made a decision based on cost, efficiency and what would best serve the largest number of people, even if they didn't realize it. I didn't always agree with their actions, but I never disagreed with their motives. They were, and are, professionals.

Sanna, I bet that if you looked past the anger, frustration, and cynicism, you would see a similar bunch of people at your university. They're not perfect, but they are professionals, and darnit they're doing the best they can, considering the limitations of time and resources.

You mentioned the football coach. Not to give details to reveal your school, but you have a very good one who is committed to the university and its athletic department. That coach brings in millions of dollars in revenues and exposure through his recruiting and his style. He certainly brings more to your school than his salary.

No one is out to get you or your fellow students. Say you don't agree with the policy or the actions, but don't make baseless charges against their personal integrity. They do what they can with the resources they are given. They use those resources to best serve an expanding population. They're human too.

Take care.

Seeing both sides,

Phabos Aphsion

[sumamael]

Sanna do it part time like me, you will have to study the same ammount and you will work beside it (to pay for it), you will do lots of traveling to and from the Uni too!

By some funny twist of fate your work deadlines will be the same date as your exams' and you will stop playing EQ in order to be able to work, study and sleep in the 24 hours of the day!
Moreover you will have to learn how to shave off a few hours from your sleep cycle!

Just look at all the advantages!

[Sanna]

If someone sits next to me and takes a drink of an alcoholic beverage, no damage is done to me. If someone sits next to me and lights a cigarette, I have to leave, or I will not be able to breathe. Everyone is entitled to chose their own form of suicide, but you can't kill me without my permission.


The note about the football coach is not supposed to be a slant to him. Rather, look at it in conjunction with the phrase following it. Is it really so hard to make sure your Fine Arts departments have things like staples and a reasonable amount of copy paper and pens for your secretaries, and THEN give the man his check?
(And it's really funny... they like him so much I think they're firing him... didn't they do that to the basketball coach who won us 8 out of 10 seasons too?)


I don't know what to do. I don't know where to go next. I've been so angry for so many months now, there's almost nothing left. I ran around in the freezing air last night in short sleeves and no coat because I was so angry I didn't stop to get one, and now my throat and nose are in a lot of pain.

I dunno. We'll see. Strength disintigrated into passion without strength, which disintigrated into anger, which has/is disintigrated/ing into nothing. Maybe I should just go.

[Dunthor Warsmith]

Originally posted by Sanna
If someone sits next to me and takes a drink of an alcoholic beverage, no damage is done to me.

The stench of alcohol (especially the types favored by college students, it seems) can make me physically ill (nausa, light headed, wicked headache, among other things).

You can't tolerated cigarette smoke, but are fine with airborne alcohol. I can generally stand cigarette smoke without trouble, but cannot tolerate airborne alcohol.

What people term "poisons" is relative - a lot of things are harmful to the human body, but some people consider their effects minimal enough, or outweighed enough by benefits, to not think of them as toxins. Many aspects of modern life, from plastics to carpets to alcohol and tar, are still harmful to the human body and are detramental everyone's health, and cause significant problems for at least some people.

------

As for the redesignating of the dream dorm as freshman, that really sucks It always seems especially cruel when the freshman get the wonderfully nice and perfect dorm when you (and all your friends) had to deal with evil pits for the first year or more.

The only logic for that choice I can think of is the numbers game: The number of houseless freshman is (relatively) low, enough to fill the (usually small) really nice dorm, but not enough to fill the (usually huge) sucky dorms. Since most colleges I've dealt with keep their freshman housing separate from the sophmore+, converting a sucky dorm to freshman housing would waste space and even make more of a housing crunch for the upperclass students. By converting the closest-to-good-fit dorm, they minimize the amount of rooms the steal from the non-freshmen, to keep the overcrowding from being too extreme.

But taking the best dorm(s) really has to sting - it begs the question, which is really worse, living in the nicest dorm on campus in a 2-person room with 4 of your friends, or living in the dark-hole-for-3 in the ancient dorm with 2 others?

[Tinile]

Sanna, I really hope you don't take this the wrong way, but don't let this stress you. College is an amazing experience in so many ways: learning new things to (hopefully) prepare you for a career, being on your own for the first time, boyfriends/girlfriends, friends you will cherish forever. It doesn't matter where you live, but who you are living with. Spruce up the ugly fireproof bricks with a plant and a poster of something sweet. We had almost every spot of wall covered with posters and collages when I was at school. When you look back after 30 years of your college time, you won't think of not being in 1 specific dorm room, but you will think of the people you spent 4 years with. People matter, not rooms you spend 9 months in, creating a future for yourself.

[Nhin Impious]

If someone sits next to me and lights a cigarette, I have to leave, or I will not be able to breathe. Everyone is entitled to chose their own form of suicide, but you can't kill me without my permission.

You started this thread with a post including the comment "waiting for the day when I just won't wake up again." Before you refer to my smoking habit as "choosing my own form of suicide" you really ought to take that big ol' cigarette-- I mean, beam, out of your own eye.

Yes, smoking is bad for you. In some cases it's very bad for you, and can cause or make worse certain diseases that really will kill you. Yet the reason people get so up in arms about it isn't that fact alone-- after all, cholesterol is bad for you, driving around in cars on the ice can be quite dangerous as well. Heck, wearing high heels is awful for your back.

The reason people get upset is that smoking is addictive, and many people find it exceedingly stressful or impossible to quit-- and while they smoke, they're looking for the next place to light one up, wondering how long it's going to be. They feel like part of their life "belongs" to their cigarettes, not to them. THAT is the danger of smoking.

I know you don't smoke-- but think about this. Who does YOUR life belong to? I give you a hint, because I like you: it's obviously not you.

You don't get any karma points for not using Marlboro Miles if you're feeding your soul to YOUR anger, hate, and fear instead. You've flung around a lot of nasty words including "cheats" and "thieves" at other people-- what is that doing to you? If it's them you're upset about, why do you keep referring to your own death?

You don't have to kill any part of yourself to come to terms with it. Sometimes it's just a matter of learning to love even the things you don't like very much. When you get ready to do that, let's talk.

Nhinx Aphsion
(who apologizes sincerely to any recently ex-smokers who now have the urge to go light one up)

[Vascha]

Originally posted by Sanna
If someone sits next to me and takes a drink of an alcoholic beverage, no damage is done to me.

Unless you're riding shotgun. )

[Annalina Romanov]

*shrug* . . . could be worse, ya know. I commute to my college, and I usually have to leave pretty darned early 'cause traffic around Atlanta can be hell. I swear . . . pour a glass of water on the road, and you suddenly get a ten-car pile-up.

As far as dorms go, home is where you make it. As long as the bathrooms are reasonably clean and your room-mates aren't complete selfish bastards, you should do okay. The 10' cubicle? Well, all I can say is make good use of the space ya got, and to avoid piling up the stuff . . . since you're probably going to be moving in and out anyway, it's best to travel light and to avoid having yet *another* thing to move. One of my tactics, for example, was to turn my PC into a combined entertainment center, so that I won't have to also drag a TV along, among other things.

As for the long walk, well, when I was still at Georgia Tech, it was a fifteen minute walk for me to classes, with five to ten minute walks between classes. Over the summer, the dinner hall on my side of campus was closed, which meant that I had to walk all the way across campus to eat lunch and dinner, which meant a walk of around 20 minutes or so. Didn't help that the lunch hall closed at 8PM, either.

Perk up . . . it ain't as bad as it seems. Look at it this way . . . you'll be getting exercise, which is just as well, 'cause a lot of people tend to pack on the pounds when they get to college.

-Annalina

[Farnyr]

Annalina gave me some ideas!

For the walk to class, why not get a bike, or a skateboard or a razor scooter or something? Makes the trip faster....Alot faster in the snow

I lived in a Tent Cabin when I was in Yosemite this summer and it was probably as big as your dorm room. But we made due. The cabinet they gave us to store our clothes was also used as an entertainment center, with my portable DVD player on top of it(Early birthday gift! ). Our hamper was...the floor, lol. We used the rafters of the tent to hang our towels and our belts and anything else we wanted to hang. Atleast youll have 4 solid walls. We didnt have 1 solid wall.

You already know how the rooms are, so just start to plan ahead. Start looking at things at Ikea or something to help you out.

[Silound]

I sympathize somewhat, but there are a few things you can getout of this that will help you in the long run in life. And no, its not one of those "I walked 5 miles uphill both ways" stories.

I share a rroom that's about 14x12, and its designed to fit 3, possibly 4 people (only two of us right now). The carpet is that sheet kind that's only for looks, not for any comfort or anything. Oh and it looks bad, ripples, stains, holes... The paint is peeling everywhere, and the drop tiles in the ceiling scatter drop tile dust all over everyything. We aren't allowed to make any changes to the rooms either. I share a bathroom with the room next door (better than community ones) that's got a toilet that can suck an elephant down, a shower with no hot water, and a chipped tile sink that has a crust growing along it's edges (maids clean it once a week) so thick I almost thought it was leftover grouting from the tiles. Oh yeah, and we have no climate control, my room is a constant 61 degrees.

Am I complaining about the quality of life here? Yes, it sucks. Worst part is, I'm in the best dorm of the 3. But at 1500 a semester including 10 meals a week, I'm not likely to get much better off campus.

Become a survivor. Learn to scavenge out what's best, and work to give yourself the best you can get. For instance, we went and got drop tiles from an empty room to finish our cieling which was half open. We got better matresses by trading internet with the RA's (who wheel and deal with people in the same way). We got ourselves a microwave (prohibited in rooms) from a dean for doing minor repairs to a few doors on the hall. My point is we did some deals and worked some leverage, and now we have what's considered the 3rd nicest room on the floor. It'll be considered the nicest when the new fuzzy carpet arrives and is installed. Also paint job should happen soon and a *gasp* light fixture too! Oh did I forget to mention we never had lights in here? Carpet was free BTW, just brought a handful of pictures to Home Depot and they donated enough carpet to redo the room Installation did cost us 50 bucks...

Get out and make the best of your existance by learning to work angles for people and trade favors and items. The ability to wheel 'n' deal will serve you well for a lifetime. See what you can get awya with changing. Dean of housing here was very willing to let us make some approved modifications, the carpet being the biggest, presuming we paid for it.

As for time to get to class, well, that never bothered me that much since no two clocks on campus and synched, but I'd go with the bike idea, or leave earlier. Walking is worth it anyway, more carbs you can burn.