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Three of us had decided to hit the Steak and Shake just over the Mississippi border during our stay at Memphis - it was cheap and the food wasn't half bad, so the idea seemed reasonable.
We got seated without issue, it's about an average evening as far as number of folks in there and everything seems like it's just going to be another dining XP.
Then SHE walks up to our table.
She welcomes us, does the usual pleasantries and small talk and we make our first mistake of being social and responding to her. She then, out of the blue, starts making assesments of our personalities for us - Herb seems kinda like the grumpy type, Chris is obviously the quiet guy and I'm the outgoing one.
OK, nothing too horrible about that, but it builds.
Drinks come and she asks for our orders - Chris had ordered no ice in his soda but she apparently was too busy profiling us to notice - no biggy though - it's only #2 and still not worth noting if things hadn't kept going interesting.
Now the appitisers arive - she's messed up Herb's stuff, giving him a cup of soup and cup of chili instead of a bowl of soup and a deluxe chili - he explains and she takes the stuff away.
A few minutes later, she's back with two bowls - hmm, she's given Herb a bowl of chili instead of the delux - OK, no biggy - he'll live.
But then she comes back a few minutes later and asks Herb if he's sure that he wants a bowl of chili AND the deluxe chili since that's alot of food after all. That kinda puzzled us for a few seconds, so she restates that him ordering a deluxe chili and a bowl of chili is alot of chili - we clarify that he hadn't ordered both, she simply got confused.
Now the main corse arives - Chris and I have ordered simular items - I chose the entre version while Chris got the single version without onions. She hands Chris a rather large version of the food heaped with onions and hands me a smaller serving with no onions.
Chris imediately notes to her that he had ordered no onions while I puzzle over what a skimpy serving I had gotten for having ordered the entre.
Ah-ha!
I get her attention before she can escape with the platter and ask if it's at all possible that she had given me Chris' food and him mine - she looks at the two and determines that this is indeed the case.
OK, we're still only at the point were we felt we were dealing with a not-so-good waitress - but then we order refills for our drinks. Chris maked sure that he got the waitress' attention and specified no ice and pointed out that she had snafu'd the first soda - she appologises and tells him no problem.
Soon afterwards she returns with the drinks - there are six icecubes floating in Chris' soda - as we stare at them she explains, "I know you said no ice in your soda, but I put six icecubes in there just in case," with that most wonderful Mississippi accent.
She then walked away to bring havok and chaos to her other tables as we absorbed what had just been said to us.
As we're finishing up, she came back and asked if we'd like any desert - no thanks for me, Chris says he's full and Herb explains he'll pass seeing as how he's diabetic.
Then she comes back for our plates and asks again if we'd like desert and tells us that she can set it up as take out if we want - Chris relents and gets a milkshake, I'm still good and Herb notes again that he's not permitted to eat desert due to being diabetic. She responds to him that she's not supposed to eat icecream either but she still does and he really should reconsider.
At this point, I notice that the manager is going around to all of the tables that she's dealing with and talking to the folks. He finally gets to us and looking a tad concerned asks if everything is ok with our waitress and our meal.
"Yes," we tell him, "she's quite entertaining."
Act 1 take 3 - she returns with the check and Chris' shake as well as a full blown determination that Herb and I should get desert. I pat my stomach for emphasis and explain that I'm still full while Herb, who had only found out that he was diabetic a few weeks ago and isn't too happy about losing desert, informs her rather gruffly and for the third time that he's diabetic and can't eat desert.
Totally unphases, she informs Herb that it's ok and she won't tell anyone if he orders himself some icecream or cake.
Realising that Herb is about to make the conversation non-family freindly, I cut in with "Miss, he's diabetic, that means he can't eat stuff like that - it'll give him a heart attack." (I know, I know - but I just needed to tell her something to shut her up.)
"Ahhhhhhh..." she responds, having apparently never heard of diabetes in what looked to be her 30+ years on some planet. She relents and leaves us to finish our sodas.
"So what kinda tip should we leave her?" asks Herb.
"Definately a good one," responds Chris digging for some cash," the floor show was excellent."
"Well," I said, looking at Herb (who's from Canada) "do you have any loonies on you - that would seem most appropiate?"
We managed to pay and tip without issue and then proceeded to recomend her to everyone we knew at the con - apparently she was consistant through out the entire weekend and no one was disappointed.
We got seated without issue, it's about an average evening as far as number of folks in there and everything seems like it's just going to be another dining XP.
Then SHE walks up to our table.
She welcomes us, does the usual pleasantries and small talk and we make our first mistake of being social and responding to her. She then, out of the blue, starts making assesments of our personalities for us - Herb seems kinda like the grumpy type, Chris is obviously the quiet guy and I'm the outgoing one.
OK, nothing too horrible about that, but it builds.
Drinks come and she asks for our orders - Chris had ordered no ice in his soda but she apparently was too busy profiling us to notice - no biggy though - it's only #2 and still not worth noting if things hadn't kept going interesting.
Now the appitisers arive - she's messed up Herb's stuff, giving him a cup of soup and cup of chili instead of a bowl of soup and a deluxe chili - he explains and she takes the stuff away.
A few minutes later, she's back with two bowls - hmm, she's given Herb a bowl of chili instead of the delux - OK, no biggy - he'll live.
But then she comes back a few minutes later and asks Herb if he's sure that he wants a bowl of chili AND the deluxe chili since that's alot of food after all. That kinda puzzled us for a few seconds, so she restates that him ordering a deluxe chili and a bowl of chili is alot of chili - we clarify that he hadn't ordered both, she simply got confused.
Now the main corse arives - Chris and I have ordered simular items - I chose the entre version while Chris got the single version without onions. She hands Chris a rather large version of the food heaped with onions and hands me a smaller serving with no onions.
Chris imediately notes to her that he had ordered no onions while I puzzle over what a skimpy serving I had gotten for having ordered the entre.
Ah-ha!
I get her attention before she can escape with the platter and ask if it's at all possible that she had given me Chris' food and him mine - she looks at the two and determines that this is indeed the case.
OK, we're still only at the point were we felt we were dealing with a not-so-good waitress - but then we order refills for our drinks. Chris maked sure that he got the waitress' attention and specified no ice and pointed out that she had snafu'd the first soda - she appologises and tells him no problem.
Soon afterwards she returns with the drinks - there are six icecubes floating in Chris' soda - as we stare at them she explains, "I know you said no ice in your soda, but I put six icecubes in there just in case," with that most wonderful Mississippi accent.
She then walked away to bring havok and chaos to her other tables as we absorbed what had just been said to us.
As we're finishing up, she came back and asked if we'd like any desert - no thanks for me, Chris says he's full and Herb explains he'll pass seeing as how he's diabetic.
Then she comes back for our plates and asks again if we'd like desert and tells us that she can set it up as take out if we want - Chris relents and gets a milkshake, I'm still good and Herb notes again that he's not permitted to eat desert due to being diabetic. She responds to him that she's not supposed to eat icecream either but she still does and he really should reconsider.
At this point, I notice that the manager is going around to all of the tables that she's dealing with and talking to the folks. He finally gets to us and looking a tad concerned asks if everything is ok with our waitress and our meal.
"Yes," we tell him, "she's quite entertaining."
Act 1 take 3 - she returns with the check and Chris' shake as well as a full blown determination that Herb and I should get desert. I pat my stomach for emphasis and explain that I'm still full while Herb, who had only found out that he was diabetic a few weeks ago and isn't too happy about losing desert, informs her rather gruffly and for the third time that he's diabetic and can't eat desert.
Totally unphases, she informs Herb that it's ok and she won't tell anyone if he orders himself some icecream or cake.
Realising that Herb is about to make the conversation non-family freindly, I cut in with "Miss, he's diabetic, that means he can't eat stuff like that - it'll give him a heart attack." (I know, I know - but I just needed to tell her something to shut her up.)
"Ahhhhhhh..." she responds, having apparently never heard of diabetes in what looked to be her 30+ years on some planet. She relents and leaves us to finish our sodas.
"So what kinda tip should we leave her?" asks Herb.
"Definately a good one," responds Chris digging for some cash," the floor show was excellent."
"Well," I said, looking at Herb (who's from Canada) "do you have any loonies on you - that would seem most appropiate?"
We managed to pay and tip without issue and then proceeded to recomend her to everyone we knew at the con - apparently she was consistant through out the entire weekend and no one was disappointed.
) where they were served by Pheobe's very absent minded sister Urcela 
Anyone else see that one?
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