In the beginning...

[Psychosis]

In the beginning... God populated the earth with broccoli and
cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all
kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then Satan created Ben and Jerry's and Krispy Creme. And Satan
said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man and Woman said "Yeah,
and another one with sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds.

And God created the healthful yogurt that woman might keep the
figure that man found so fair.

And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from
the cane, and combined them. And woman went from size 3 to size 9.

So God said, "Try my fresh green salad."

And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing and garlic toast on
the side. And man and woman had to unfasten their belts.

God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive
oil in which to cook them."

And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so
big it needed its own platter. And man gained more weight and his
cholesterol went through the roof.

God then brought running shoes so that his children might lose
those extra pounds.

And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have
to toil changing the channels. And man and woman watched TV and
gained more pounds.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and
brimming with nutrition.

And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy
center into chips and deep-fried them. And man and woman gained
another ten pounds.


God then gave lean beef so that man and woman might consume fewer
calories and still satisfy their appetite.

And Satan created McDonald's and it's 99-cent double cheeseburger.
Then said, "You want fries with that?" And man replied, "Yea! And
super size 'em." And Satan said "It is good." And man went into
cardiac arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

And Satan created HMOs.

[Lanir Odysia]

I've seen that before but I don't think it had the HMO's at the end. Nice touch to whoever added it.

ttfn
Lanir

[Lilosh]

*snicker*


I like the last part especially.


-Lilosh

[Dunthor Warsmith]

lol, that was quite enjoyable

*dives at some more nutrition stripped unhealth saturated fries*

[Tebyen Trueheart]

Lol, so true, so true.

[Cantatus]

Woo, if that's true, I'll see you in Hell where I'll be packing my artiries with salsa and fried chicken! :twisted:

Oh, and is it really any surprise that Satan created HMOs? I think we all knew that already!

[Lothay]

Someone pass me another slice of pizza. And a cheeseburger. Super-size those fries. I need a shake and a large cola.

And a whole cheesecake.

Cantatus, save room for me on the bench in Hell, 'cause I'm going to need like half of it.

- Lothay
~ Doesn't eat anything with the words "Fat Free" on the packaging.

[Ilona]

Sorry to be dense: What's HMO?

[Wyrdlan]

/sigh Euros


"Health Maintenance Organization"


They are like the restrictive health insurance from... welll... hell.

[Psychosis]

Basically any insurance you get is either PPO or HMO take your flavor.

Either way you are going to get screwed by them the only way to get good health care is to just pay cash.

[Ngreth Thergn]

PPO = preferred Provider Organization

HMO = Health Maintenance Organization

In an PPO you chose a "doctor" from a list of doctors (Most lists are large enough to get a good doctor... MOST is the word here) Sometimes this doctor can be an "office" of doctors.
This doctor is your doctor, if you want to see another doctor, you have to have this doctor "refer" you. But at least you have a Doctor deciding on your care.

In an HMO you have a host of doctors, and you can go to any of them... BUT an administrator of the HMO who never sees you decides what care you get. Not the Doctors you see, not you, this administrator does. This administrator may or may not be a doctor, but in either case, their first concern is the HMO not you the patient. Now they have to balance how much the care you would need would cost, vs the lawsuit you would hit them with for not getting the care you needed, so you can often get the care you need. But all too often, you don't. Now this is a generalization... and there may be some very good HMO's out there... but I have a PPO so I can't say from experience.

[Psychosis]

I've had both. If you can go PPO. If you can afford it pay cash.

[Idara]

No kidding. I've worked for physician's for the last 15 years of my life, and trust me if you can go PPO do it. Don't think that the small amount of money you're going to save per month by using the HMO is going to be worth it. I've seen HMO's deny a patient BRAIN SURGERY because we hadn't done "enough" testing (how many different views of that big honking tumor do you need sir?). And I've seen a man in such severe pain from a herniated disc in his spine spend six weeks in hell while we begged, screamed and finally threatened his HMO so we could get his surgery done. It took over a week to finally get past the pre-certification clerk who had a high school education and typing skills of 35 wpm and kept refusing his surgery. A WEEK! To get past someone who had no medical training whatsoever and was simply working with basic guidelines in a manual. The poor patient couldn't walk, but the clerk kept insisting he couldn't have surgery until he'd gone to physical therapy. /sigh

[Cantatus]

Cantatus, save room for me on the bench in Hell, 'cause I'm going to need like half of it.

I think after a while you'll have to find your own bench! *loosens his belt*