I lied

[Lling]

I told myself I would not care anymore.

I promised myself that I could never again get so caught up in a relationship that had the potential to hurt me so deeply. I would certainly never care about people I will never really meet or KNOW in my real life.

I lied. I lied to myself, which is the worst kind of lie. I ignored all my gut feelings and my instincts. I let myself get caught up in the emotions and I got lost.

Now I am paying the price. My heart is going to be trampled and I am not sure I am strong enough to handle the pain.

I check the National Leagure standings every single day. I get that sick yet hopeful feeling in the pit of my stomach as SI.com loads. This year's National League Central race might kill me before it is all over.

The last time the Cubs were in a playoff game was the day my mother died. I left the hospital feeling kind of numb - it hadn't hit me yet. I went to her house, sat on her couch, turned on her TV - and watched MY team die in the 3rd straight game. They could not even give me the comfort of winning ONE playoff game that year.

So I said - never again.

And yet here I am - caught up helplessly and hopefully - desperate for this year to be different.

Feels like every other year for a Cubs fan.

[Xenephex]

I was living and working in Chicago in 1969 (Lived just off Addison, in fact). It would be hard to describe the heartbreak of that year and the general feeling of gloom that descended as September proceeded and hope failed. It pervaded the entire city.

I hear you. Let me be the first to say: "Wait till next year."

[Verdandi]

Having weathered four Super Bowls as a Buffalo Bills fan...I can relate hehe. But you know what? It taught me that while it's true that greater love hath no one than to lay down your life for a friend, fans of underdog teams come in a close second. There's always the pathetic hangers-on who run out and buy the latest champion's merchandise the instant the championship ends, and swagger as if they scored the winning points themselves. How much infinitely more impressive it was to stroll around a mall in the 'burbs of Buffalo after that ill-fated fourth Super Bowl and see in a single glance: two caps, three t-shirts, and a set of suspenders, all emblazoned with the logo of the hometown boys. Looking in any other direction for even a moment yielded similar results. Fans to the end.

I do remember my own personal low point, although thankfully it didn't involve any loved ones. It was during the last of the four Super Bowls, at halftime. We were up for the second time against those, um, *eyes the crowd* not-my-favorite-team Cowboys. After being trounced rather rudely last year, we were actually winning at halftime, by a full touchdown. This year it could happen, it really could happen. I honestly, cross my heart, went into the bathroom and got down on my knees in gratitude. In the second half everything disintegrated into another trouncing.

Of course, in my case I placed the blame on God rather than on the Bills. I didn't entirely forgive Him until the Sabres made it well into the hockey playoffs several years later.

Come down to Cincinnati and help me teach em how to do it, Lling.

[Hobbun]

Lling, I know what you are saying. I have been a Cubs fan for a LONG time. But I kinda gave up on them for awhile because I guess you could say I got sick of seeing them lose. So maybe you can't say I am one of the "true" fans.

But like you, I told myself would not let myself get caught up in it again. Only get hopeful for them to win it all once they have clinched the playoff spot. And maybe not even then...

But again like yourself, I am checking the box scores everyday and even watching some games. Heck, yesterday I kept flipping back and forth to the Cubs website to check the game with Houston. I know I am setting myself up as well to be disappointed, but its hard not to.

I just can never forget that ball rolling right through Durham's legs... *shakes head*

Hobbun

[Chenier]

/comfort Lling and other "real" fans...

I'm from Indiana, so I have no team (though I used to feel really special about the field goal kickers for the Colts, since they were the only ones who scored)

Originally posted by Verdandi
Having weathered four Super Bowls as a Buffalo Bills fan...

On an uplifting note, did you know that you can buy a "winghead" now to support your boys?! I work with a couple of Buffalogians (Buffaloites? Buffoons?) and the one guys just ordered and received his winghead foam hat (think cheesehead). They're all the rage!

He wore it to our team meeting this week (freak).

[Morani]

I'm a Cubs fan too (even though I've spent my whole life living in Michigan). I think it's an underdog thing. Might explain why I'm a Lions fan too. (I'm SOOO glad I'm not prone to suicide. )


Some quotes about Cubs fans:
Being a Cubs fan is a lot like being a patient in the intensive care unit at a hospital. Every once in while, you will flat line, swearing you will never be a Cubs fan again. There, out of nowhere, the Cubs will put together a great season, and you are brought back to life. It's similar to when Noah Wyle would shock victims back to life on E.R. - Bryan Haines

Being a Cubs fan is like going on a blind date every year. At the start, you are convinced that "This is it!" But after a little teasing, you just end up crying yourself to sleep… - Andy Lurie

Being a Cubs fan is like dating the class virgin; you know that you aren't going to score so you might as well enjoy her personality. - Unknown

Being a Cubs fan is a microcosmic Jewish experience. It teaches faith, patience, humility -- and above all, the hope and prayer that the pennant will be here, next year. - Unknown

Being a Cubs fan is a non-fatal, but non-curable, disease. It doesn't kill you, but sometimes you wish it would." - Bruce Ladd Jr.

I fear when the day finally comes that the Cubs win the World Series. The following morning, 20,000 people will jump off the top of Tribune Tower, because what's the use?" - Tom Dreesen

[Lling]

Morani, what a wonderful collection of quotations - thank you for sharing them.

I believe Mike Royko was the one who said that the Cubs winning the World Series signals the end of the world - and it's even in the Bible. "When the small bears from the windy place capture the flag, the end is nigh!"



"Baseball is a passion that bonds and divides all those who know it." -- Greg Hall

[Kritta]

Been a huge ChiCubs fan all my life.
Been a huge KCChiefs fan all my life.

And boy, it's not easy.

[Draggar]

I get my heart ripped out every year...

I'm a Red Sox fan.

[Zeralenn]

I don't follow baseball, but I do follow football.

Unfortunately I'm a New York Giants fan. So far they're looking like a complete mess -- Shockey with a broken rib, lost all their preseason games ... sigh ...

...Zera

[Menious]

I have been a KC Royals fan since I was old enough to understand the game, bout '85. Granted that is when we won the World Series, but man, WHAT happened?

Menious

[Phabos]

As a lifelong Cardinals fan (lived in Missouri all my life) I have a special place in my heart for Cubs fans. You all give us someone to look up to and say, "There but for the grace of God go I."

And Verdandi, I've also been a lifelong Cowboys fan. The years they trounced the Bills were very nice, but tides have turned away from Dallas.

/auction WTB a halfway decent quarterback! PST!


Phabos Aphsion
Drunken Paladin of Brell

[Moonlilly]

I've never been a Cubs fan but I can only imagine it would be like being a Vanderbilt Football fan.

[Xenephex]

I actually grew up as a Detroit Tigers fan and still follow them. The Cubs became my NL team when I was living in Chi, as I stated above.

Yeah, being a Tigers fan really sucks right now, as they stand a chance of becoming the worst team ever this year, but at least they have won two World Series in my lifetime.

Being a Cubs fan on the other hand...

In fact, being a Chicago baseball fan at all. You would have to be, what? Probably over 90 years old to remember the last time either Chicago team won a world series?

That means that not even your Grandfathers can regale you with tales of the glory years. It means that you have nothing but years and years of disappointment and failure within living memory. At least in Boston there's only one team.

[Lling]

And at least the Red Sox won a World Series in living memory. the Cubs have not even BEEN to the World Series since 1945.

The hallmark of being a Cubs fan is living with and actually cherishing the eternal heartbreak.